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that you open the sack and count out the money to the principal citizens
of your town, they to take it in trust [Cries of "Oh! Oh! Oh!"], and use
it in such ways as to them shall seem best for the propagation and
preservation of your community's noble reputation for incorruptible
honesty [more cries]--a reputation to which their names and their efforts
will add a new and far-reaching lustre." [Enthusiastic outburst of
sarcastic applause.] That seems to be all. No--here is a postscript:
"'P.S.--CITIZENS OF HADLEYBURG: There is no test-remark--nobody made
one. [Great sensation.] There wasn't any pauper stranger, nor any
twenty-dollar contribution, nor any accompanying benediction and
compliment--these are all inventions. [General buzz and hum of
astonishment and delight.] Allow me to tell my story--it will take but a
word or two. I passed through your town at a certain time, and received
a deep offence which I had not earned. Any other man would have been
content to kill one or two of you and call it square, but to me that
would have been a trivial revenge, and inadequate; for the dead do not
suffer. Besides I could not kill you all--and, anyway, made as I am,
even that would not have satisfied me. I wanted to damage every man in
the place, and every woman--and not in their bodies or in their estate,
but in their vanity--the place where feeble and foolish people are most
vulnerable. So I disguised myself and came back and studied you. You
were easy game. You had an old and lofty reputation for honesty, and
naturally you were proud of it--it was your treasure of treasures, the
very apple of your eye. As soon as I found out that you carefully and
vigilantly kept yourselves and your children out of temptation, I knew
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