The Letters Of Mark Twain, Complete


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And this nasty law, this filthy law, this unspeakable law calls itself  
a "regulation for the protection of owners of copyright!" Can sarcasm go  
further than that? In what way does it protect them? Inspiration itself  
could not furnish a rational answer to that question. Whom does  
it protect, then? Nobody, as far as I can see, but the foreign  
thief--sometimes--and his fellow-footpad the U. S. government, all the  
time. What could the Central Company do with the counterfeit bonds after  
it had bought them of the star spangled banner Master-thief? Sell  
them at a dollar apiece and fetch down the market for the genuine  
hundred-dollar bond? What could I do with that 20-cent copy of "Roughing  
It" which the United States has collared on the border and is waiting  
to release to me for cash in case I am willing to come down to its  
moral level and help rob myself? Sell it at ten or fifteen cents--duty  
added--and destroy the market for the original $3,50 book? Who ever did  
invent that law? I would like to know the name of that immortal jackass.  
Dear sir, I appreciate your courtesy in stretching your authority in the  
desire to do me a kindness, and I sincerely thank you for it. But I have  
no use for that book; and if I were even starving for it I would not pay  
duty on in either to get it or suppress it. No doubt there are ways in  
which I might consent to go into partnership with thieves and fences,  
but this is not one of them. This one revolts the remains of my  
self-respect; turns my stomach. I think I could companion with a  
highwayman who carried a shot-gun and took many risks; yes, I think  
I should like that if I were younger; but to go in with a big rich  
697  


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