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The Count, at this, glanced downward to the straps of his pantaloons,
and then taking hold of the end of one of his coat-tails, held it up
close to his eyes for some minutes. Letting it fall, at last, his mouth
extended itself very gradually from ear to ear; but I do not remember
that he said any thing in the way of reply.
Hereupon we recovered our spirits, and the Doctor, approaching the Mummy
with great dignity, desired it to say candidly, upon its honor as
a gentleman, if the Egyptians had comprehended, at any period, the
manufacture of either Ponnonner's lozenges or Brandreth's pills.
We looked, with profound anxiety, for an answer--but in vain. It was
not forthcoming. The Egyptian blushed and hung down his head. Never was
triumph more consummate; never was defeat borne with so ill a
grace. Indeed, I could not endure the spectacle of the poor Mummy's
mortification. I reached my hat, bowed to him stiffly, and took leave.
Upon getting home I found it past four o'clock, and went immediately
to bed. It is now ten A.M. I have been up since seven, penning these
memoranda for the benefit of my family and of mankind. The former I
shall behold no more. My wife is a shrew. The truth is, I am heartily
sick of this life and of the nineteenth century in general. I am
convinced that every thing is going wrong. Besides, I am anxious to
know who will be President in 2045. As soon, therefore, as I shave and
swallow a cup of coffee, I shall just step over to Ponnonner's and get
embalmed for a couple of hundred years.
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