The Letters Of Mark Twain, Complete


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there can be no male Member but myself. Some day I may admit males,  
but I don't know--they are capricious and inharmonious, and their ways  
provoke me a good deal. It is a matter which the Club shall decide.  
I have made four appointments in the past three or four months: You  
as Member for France, a young Highland girl as Member for Scotland, a  
Mohammedan girl as Member for Bengal, and a dear and bright young  
niece of mine as Member for the United States--for I do not represent a  
country myself, but am merely Member at Large for the Human Race.  
You must not try to resign, for the laws of the Club do not allow that.  
You must console yourself by remembering that you are in the best of  
company; that nobody knows of your membership except myself--that no  
Member knows another's name, but only her country; that no taxes are  
levied and no meetings held (but how dearly I should like to attend  
one!).  
One of my Members is a Princess of a royal house, another is the  
daughter of a village book-seller on the continent of Europe. For the  
only qualification for Membership is intellect and the spirit of good  
will; other distinctions, hereditary or acquired, do not count.  
May I send you the Constitution and Laws of the Club? I shall be so  
pleased if I may. It is a document which one of my daughters typewrites  
for me when I need one for a new Member, and she would give her eyebrows  
to know what it is all about, but I strangle her curiosity by saying:  
1059  


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