The Innocents Abroad


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ahead. It is madness to travel in Syria without an umbrella. They told  
me in Beirout (these people who always gorge you with advice) that it was  
madness to travel in Syria without an umbrella. It was on this account  
that I got one.  
But, honestly, I think an umbrella is a nuisance any where when its  
business is to keep the sun off. No Arab wears a brim to his fez, or  
uses an umbrella, or any thing to shade his eyes or his face, and he  
always looks comfortable and proper in the sun. But of all the  
ridiculous sights I ever have seen, our party of eight is the most so  
--they do cut such an outlandish figure. They travel single file; they all  
wear the endless white rag of Constantinople wrapped round and round  
their hats and dangling down their backs; they all wear thick green  
spectacles, with side-glasses to them; they all hold white umbrellas,  
lined with green, over their heads; without exception their stirrups are  
too short--they are the very worst gang of horsemen on earth, their  
animals to a horse trot fearfully hard--and when they get strung out one  
after the other; glaring straight ahead and breathless; bouncing high and  
out of turn, all along the line; knees well up and stiff, elbows flapping  
like a rooster's that is going to crow, and the long file of umbrellas  
popping convulsively up and down--when one sees this outrageous picture  
exposed to the light of day, he is amazed that the gods don't get out  
their thunderbolts and destroy them off the face of the earth! I do--I  
wonder at it. I wouldn't let any such caravan go through a country of  
mine.  
527  


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