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over and make a mess of it. Go hang yourself, sir--by the handle--and

don't let me hear from you again."

Dorothy was much shocked by the dreadful language the utensils

employed, and she thought that they must have had very little proper

training. So she said, addressing the King, who seemed very unfit to rule

his turbulent subjects:

I wish you'd decide my fate right away. I can't stay here all day, trying

to find out what you're going to do with me."

This thing is becoming a regular broil, and it's time I took part in it,"

observed a big gridiron, coming forward.

What I'd like to know," said a can-opener, in a shrill voice, "is why the

little girl came to our forest anyhow and why she intruded upon Captain

Dipp--who ought to be called Dippy--and who she is, and where she

came from, and where she is going, and why and wherefore and therefore

and when."

I'm sorry to see, Sir Jabber," remarked the King to the can-opener, "that

you have such a prying disposition. As a matter of fact, all the things

you mention are none of our business."

Having said this the King relighted his pipe, which had gone out.

Tell me, please, what IS our business?" inquired a potato-masher,

winking at Dorothy somewhat impertinently. "I'm fond of little girls,

myself, and it seems to me she has as much right to wander in the forest

as we have."

Who accuses the little girl, anyway?" inquired a rolling-pin. "What has

she done?"

I don't know," said the King. "What has she done, Captain Dipp?"

That's the trouble, your Majesty. She hasn't done anything," replied the

Captain.

What do you want me to do?" asked Dorothy.

This question seemed to puzzle them all. Finally, a chafingdish,

exclaimed irritably:

The Emerald City of Oz