usually applied by compassionate females to ladies who are

endeavouring to ferment themselves into hysterics.

Coach is ready, Sir,' said Sam, appearing at the door.

Come along,' cried Wardle. 'I'll carry her downstairs.'

At this proposition, the hysterics came on with redoubled violence.

The landlady was about to enter a very violent protest against this

proceeding, and had already given vent to an indignant inquiry

whether Mr Wardle considered himself a lord of the creation, when Mr

Jingle interposed -

Boots,' said he, 'get me an officer.'

Stay, stay,' said little Mr Perker. 'Consider, Sir, consider.'

I'll not consider,' replied Jingle. 'She's her own mistress - see who

dares to take her away - unless she wishes it.'

I WON'T be taken away,' murmured the spinster aunt. 'I DON'T wish

it.' (Here there was a frightful relapse.)

My dear Sir,' said the little man, in a low tone, taking Mr Wardle and

Mr Pickwick apart - 'my dear Sir, we're in a very awkward situation.

It's a distressing case - very; I never knew one more so; but really, my

dear sir, really we have no power to control this lady's actions. I

warned you before we came, my dear sir, that there was nothing to

look to but a compromise.'

There was a short pause.

What kind of compromise would you recommend?' inquired Mr

Pickwick.

Why, my dear Sir, our friend's in an unpleasant position - very much

so. We must be content to suffer some pecuniary loss.'

I'll suffer any, rather than submit to this disgrace, and let her, fool as

she is, be made miserable for life,' said Wardle.

I rather think it can be done,' said the bustling little man. 'Mr Jingle,

will you step with us into the next room for a moment?'

Mr Jingle assented, and the quartette walked into an empty

apartment.

The Pickwick Papers