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higher rank who happens to come along. He knows all that.
LYÚBA. That's just why I am afraid. He knows that, and may want to take
some action.
NICHOLAS IVÁNOVICH. His conscience--the God that dwells within him--will
decide that. Had he come to me I should have given him only one piece of
advice: not to do anything in which he is guided by his reason
alone--nothing is worse than that--but only to act when his whole being
demands it. Now I, for instance, wished to act according to Christ's
injunction: to leave father, wife and children and to follow Him, and I
left home, but how did it end? It ended by my coming back and living
with you in luxury in town. Because I was trying to do more than I had
strength for, I have landed myself in this degrading and senseless
position: I wish to live simply and to work with my hands, but in these
surroundings, with lackeys and porters, it seems a kind of affectation.
I see that, even now, Jacob Nikonórych is laughing at me.
CARPENTER. Why should I laugh? You pay me, and give me my tea. I am
grateful to you.
LYÚBA. I wonder if I had not better go to him.
NICHOLAS IVÁNOVICH. My dear, my darling, I know you find it hard and are
frightened, though you should not be so. After all, I am a man who
understands life. Nothing evil can happen. All that appears evil really
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