sly" [voice down to an impressive whisper, now,] "and buy up a hundred

and thirteen wild cat banks in Ohio, Indiana, Kentucky, Illinois and

Missouri--notes of these banks are at all sorts of discount now--average

discount of the hundred and thirteen is forty-four per cent--buy them all

up, you see, and then all of a sudden let the cat out of the bag! Whiz!

the stock of every one of those wildcats would spin up to a tremendous

premium before you could turn a handspring--profit on the speculation not

a dollar less than forty millions!" [An eloquent pause, while the

marvelous vision settled into W.'s focus.] "Where's your hogs now?

Why my dear innocent boy, we would just sit down on the front door-steps

and peddle banks like lucifer matches!"

Washington finally got his breath and said:

Oh, it is perfectly wonderful! Why couldn't these things have happened

in father's day? And I--it's of no use--they simply lie before my face

and mock me. There is nothing for me but to stand helpless and see other

people reap the astonishing harvest."

"Never mind, Washington, don't you worry. I'll fix you. There's plenty

of chances. How much money have you got?"

In the presence of so many millions, Washington could not keep from

blushing when he had to confess that he had but eighteen dollars in the

world.

The Gilded Age