forth we will beware of the intoxicating bowl.--'First Edition of

the Californian.'

The head editor has been in here raising the mischief, and tearing his

hair and kicking the furniture about, and abusing me like a pickpocket.

He says that every time he leaves me in charge of the paper for half an

hour I get imposed upon by the first infant or the first idiot that comes

along. And he says that that distressing item of Mr. Bloke's is nothing

but a lot of distressing bosh, and has no point to it, and no sense in

it, and no information in it, and that there was no sort of necessity for

stopping the press to publish it.

Now all this comes of being good-hearted. If I had been as

unaccommodating and unsympathetic as some people, I would have told

Mr. Bloke that I wouldn't receive his communication at such a late hour;

but no, his snuffling distress touched my heart, and I jumped at the

chance of doing something to modify his misery. I never read his item to

see whether there was anything wrong about it, but hastily wrote the few

lines which preceded it, and sent it to the printers. And what has my

kindness done for me? It has done nothing but bring down upon me a storm

of abuse and ornamental blasphemy.

Now I will read that item myself, and see if there is any foundation for

all this fuss. And if there is, the author of it shall hear from me.

I have read it, and I am bound to admit that it seems a little mixed at a

204

Sketches New and Old